Half empty.

I think this post is going to be "glass half empty".

No tales of a social worker #2 this week due to the fact that I've had a pretty bad week. More bad than good for right now. Most days I just want to quit my job and hide under a rock. Today was definitely one of those day.

And on top of all that, my car died today. It can be fixed I'm told. However, if it is expensive I will cry. I can almost guarantee it. I hate our reliance on cars. I wish I worked close enough to my home that I could walk or ride my bike to work. I wonder if the Riverview Police Department is hiring for anything..hm...

Next-I really enjoy being able to make my own schedule, but I am really starting to not like how it changes every week. I don't like not knowing when I'll have time to do things. Like, I've been feeling pretty horrible about myself lately. And if I could just figure out a time to be able to run, or be able to run on a regular basis, I'd feel so much better. But alas, that is not true. I've made too many obligations outside of work as well. gah..

Sorry about the complain-fest. I'm just having a pretty all-around bad week and needed to let it all out.



I swear I"m being forced to work harder for my week off I have coming up...if only I can not lose my mind before then...

here's hopin'.

Tales of a Social Worker #1

Alright-since I only just decided to do this little segment like two days ago, it's going to be not so interesting this week, because I wasn't particularly observant.

The event that inspired this segment. And it's not really even super interesting, it is just that this has never happened to me before and I was impressed. I was driving down the lodge and I glanced at a lady driving next to me... passing me I should say, after I was already going 10 over the speed limit. So she was going like 15 over. Anyways. As I glanced, she was yawning something fierce. That yawn, made ME yawn. All I could think was, "Geez, that yawn has got some power". A yawn that inspired a blog. I told you it wasn't interesting.

Next. I was driving through Delray aka the ghetto. And not just like, hey this is kinda ghetto-y. No. Delray IS the ghetto. Anywhoo. I was coming up to a light. And it was green. BUT it was also blinking red. I didn't know what to do. Thank goodness there were not cars around, so I just stopped for the blinking red and continued on my way.

Lastly. I was driving to a clients house on Friday. She lives off of Gratiot. I got off 94 to Gratiot and was preparing to turn right. There was also a fire truck in the other right hand turn lane (there are two). The fire truck and I turned at the same time. As I was turning I noticed in my pariph a red pick-up truck around to t-bone me. So I swerved. I looked back to make sure he still wasn't going to hit me and I turned just in time to see him giving me a look that screamed "why did YOU just almost hit ME?" I seriously think the dude thought I ran the light. He then proceeded to follow me down Gratiot. Pull over when I was stopped at a red light and write down my license plate number. Not worried though. He ran the light, not me. And honestly, I think the Detroit police have their hands full with murders and drugs and such, and aren't really concerned with finding me.

Ok. That was all for my first "Tales of a Social Worker". Stay tuned for next week because I'm pretty sure my next week is going to be full of goodies.

New Idea.

I saw something random today that inspired me.

I feel like I should create a segment on my blog (since I'm not writing much as of late) that features the random, crazy, silly, scary things I hear about, see, and that happen to me daily while driving around Detroit. I'll call it "Tales of Social Worker".

The event inspired this was extremely minor. Actually made me laugh, and it's not really related to Detroit or social work, so I'm not really sure what made me think of it.


Anyways. I'll start compiling tidbits during the week and post them here laters.

PEACE.

20 days

I haven't posted a blog in 20 days.

I will state it's because nothing is going on in my life, so I hate to bore you with everyday things.

Also, sometimes I'll start to write a blog and for some reason they lead to complain-fests and I try not to do that ever. via blog or life.


So. Radio silence until something exciting happens. Until then. Peace to you.

without.

I was pondering something yesterday. That perhaps, isn't something to ponder, but I thought it was effective for me. I was wondering to myself what my life would be or how I would be if I didn't know Christ.

I would like to think I'd still be compassionate, still be wanting to change the world and show others love, but you can never be too sure. I would like to think I'd still want to wait for marriage for certain things, and I would like to think that I would think of others first instead of trying to move up for myself in life.

I can hope I'd still me. BUT I know I would feel so hopeless in the meantime. I have gone through things, and felt things that I know I wouldn't be able to make it through without God's protection and grace. I know I wouldn't. I can't really even think of how I would handle life if I didn't know God was right there at my side.

It's a scary thought.

I still feel bored with my life right now. I still feel like I need to do something more than what I'm doing. I am still not sure how. I think I need to start really change how I'm doing life right now. I really enjoy the traditions I've created here, I feel like I belong around the people I'm around, however, I feel like I'm creating to many earthly connections. I don't want to feel bad if God calls me to do something. I'd be sad to leave it all behind, but I need to do what God wants me to do, not what everyone else wants me to do. I'm really fighting that right now. Stop being a people-pleaser, be a God-pleaser. Right?

Right.

Elimination.

There are some things I've tried to eliminate from my everyday vocab. Not necessarily individual words, but more so over-exaggerations that don't apply to my life what so ever.

"I'm STARVING". I am not starving. Children in Africa are starving. I am just really hungry and probably shouldn't eat that snack anyways because I already had lunch.

"I NEED that". I don't need anything. God has provided just enough. I want. Not need.

"That's gay". This is a big one that I still let slip every once in a while. I don't like it. Never have liked it...so I'm not saying it.


The one I just thought of is the idea of Christians "chasing after God". I used to fall prey to this idea. That I am spending my life chasing God and chasing His will for my life.

I had it so backwards.

God is chasing ME. God is chasing US. And we spend our life running away. Running away because we want to do it OUR way. Not His way. Why? Because we are sinful beings who don't know any better.


I let God catch me. That's something I've definitely improved. When I lean away from Him, He always pulls me right back. And for that I am so grateful.

encounter.

i've had my first real, moral, spiritual, and personal problem at work. there are many things that the families that i work with do, that i don't agree with. but i usually shrug them off and think "i'll do it differently with my kids".

until now.

i can't really say what it is exactly. you know, confidentiality. but, i can say it is horrific. and i can't do anything about it. i feel sick. and sad.

what am i supposed to do?

all i can do is pray. all i can do is have complete faith in God to help this woman. have complete faith that God will give me the strength to get through this. have faith that God will change this mom's heart. have faith that God will provide me with a new job.

faith and prayer.